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Birthright Journal - Day 3

5/21 “Today I feel like doing everything, (whistle up, whistle down)”

Pudding for breakfast!?

They had this conveyor belt toaster thing and some idiot (me) put a roll in there and it eventually set off the fire alarm. They literally had a picture of the roll I had next to the toaster with a big red “No!” symbol on it! --- We are going to Ben Gurion's Grave. He's like Israel's George Washington. On the bus. I guess we now have a "Mensch of the day" for the day before. I won it because for some of the ice breakers I brought chairs for my group, not just my own. In reality, I only got chairs for my team for “solidarity”. My team didn’t have to sit on prickles. Prize was wafers.

Ben Gurion seemed like a man quite similar to Papa. He kind of just did his thing quietly, but also setting a trail for the rest of the nation. He wanted to be buried in the desert (Negev) so that people will have to pass through it to visit his grave. His mission (after being the first prime minister) was to bloom the desert, believing that Jews are to weather the desert (I'm sure he had a more poetic phrase for that). I guess if we get stuck wandering the desert for another 70 years, we might as well plant some trees. I also got a rock. They have a nice interesting reason for putting rocks on graves. Suck it, crosses! --- Hiking... a lot…of many…stairs… We started where the green is waaay in the horizon!

Someone played Toto's Africa on the bus! For those who had the displeasure of knowing, I got that song stuck in my head like 3 weeks ago, and once I do, it needs to be replaced, or that’s the #1 song I’m singing in my head. And more often than not, it tends to leave my head.

Needless to say, I heard my jam and started singing! I got a large portion of the bus to sing too. We're in a strip mall. More shawarma. I think shawarma is Israel’s version of hamburgers. And then hummus is Israeli ketchup. I want to say that their meat is healthier than America, but it’s hard to say; I don’t eat burgers. --- We visited a Bedouin village. There was a video that seemed a little skewed of how they are treated by the Israeli government. It seems like they're only Israelis by necessity, and if Palestine was a state, they'd identify with them; not Israelis, and definitely not Jews. They had a few Bedouin girls talk to us and answer questions. They seemed pretty stuck in their ways. That, and it seemed like they had a script to stick to. When a few iffy questions were asked, one girl started answering it, then the other tried to silence her with a “what she means is…”.

They seem to have a big victim complex. They were saying, “If Israel is so for equality, then how come we don’t have to enlist in the army?” What!? You’re mad because you aren’t drafted!? (By the way, nothing’s stopping them if they wanted to.)

Maybe I got the propaganda saying Israel is doing everything they can, when they’re not, or, the Bedouin people aren't open to adapting. I guess it’s up to you to decide. I will note that we passed a bunch of pallets of bricks and stuff from the government, not being used.

A lot of people asked about marriages and homosexuals. There aren't gays, the marriages are prearranged, sometimes they're cousins, and if there were gays they'd be killed.

I felt like breaking the tension a bit. “Do you guys like music?” They can’t stand Justin Bieber either, so maybe we can coexist. We got a lot of not fun questions getting asked, like rape and the army. A lot of the people on our group were shocked when they heard about these policies. This is where my self-hating millennial-ism leaked a bit.

Yeah, in America it’s all well and good to have SJW’s define every small variant of “rape” and “abuse”, but you really think these people, who haven’t adapted to 2017, let alone 1917, view rape and abuse the same way as us? Oy, their fragile little complexes were glitching out.

Like, I don’t think they have the concept of “consent”, so there’s no such thing as rape between husband and wife.


Off to a different Bedouin village. These Bedouins seem to have adapted a little more to modern life, taking advantage of the tourists in the form of camels and jewelry, and camping and such.

Speaking of which, we are going to ride camels. We named our camel Na'a'kah, which is Hebrew for a female camel.

On our trip, we have the tour guide, bus driver, security guard, and two “adults”, chaperoning us. The two adults got on a camel and it decided to pick a fight with another camel. They were bucked around, and now we have to keep them from getting triggered by seeing camels now. Bedouin tea is OK, coffee is really gross. It’s watery and bitter but not a strong bitter, but there's no other flavor.

Wow! Coffee, tea, grape jello, beef, cucumbers with the skin!? Who am I!?

(Update: we can add peaches, lamb, and scallions to the list!)

The head of the village spoke to us. I gotta say, after the last village, I didn’t really care for what this guy had to say, so I just played with my tea "nudules". That kinda sucks because he seems cool. Someone asked him if he has multiple wives and he responded with, “one’s hard enough!” I like him.

Too bad I was more interested with this bird who was walking upside down on the tent.

--- Stargazing. Mom, you're going to be so jealous! There were so many stars and the world looked huge!

“Somewherrrrre out therrrrre…” All I kept thinking is that I have never been happier in my life. ...Well, maybe it's tied for watching Star Wars: The Force Awakens in expensive-max 3D...maybe it's because of stars? --- The bonfire was great, and all those Shabbat nights at home singing songs with the family (so we couldn’t look up the lyrics or anything like that) prepared me for this. Everyone seemed impressed at all the songs I knew. They don't need to know that at home, we sing together more often than eat together! The tent does not look like a fun time. We are waking up tomorrow to see the sunrise, so at least I won't be in there for long.

See the only pink sleeping bag thingy? That’s me.

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