I'm finally getting excited again for Star Wars!
I've been pretty bummed by the last two Star Wars movies and to be honest, the last teaser and this new "first look" have been really undewhelming. So why am I getting all excited?
Whatever it is, I watched the teaser and decided to figured out the whole movie. The more I think about it, the more questionable it becomes, so I'm just going to post it before I decide it's stupid, like I usually do!
first, though, some observations:
1) How did Rey get a new Luke's Lightsaber!?
Here's a side-by-side from TFA:
I don't have an answer, but the movie better! It looked kinda broke last time we saw it!
2) Evil Rey is obviously a test or something. Do the math! the angles say it all!
3) The alphabet fleet returns!
I'm very happy that Y-Wings are back, but so are B-Wings! Obviously, Leia will be on the Blockade Runner, but what's with that new ship? It looks like the Falcon at first, but It actually isn't. Also, Poe's Black Squadron X-Wing is not present, either.
4) Inside the new ship, we see two new characters: a pilot who wears a mask so he can't see, and Jahnna *wink* not really *wink* Calrissian wearing a sleepmask or something else that covers her eyes.
Also, how are they all fitting in that space and why aren't they wearing seatbelts!? TIE's are firing at them!
5) Is Kylo taking down one of his F-REN-ds?
I honestly don't think he is in this shot, but I do think he will in the movie.
6) How long are they going to be at the Death Star wreckage?
7) BTW, if you didn't think Kylo Ren was in his ship in the teaser showdown with Rey:
It's the same gloves!
8) This doesn't look real. like, how do they get out of there?
Here's what'll happen:
The FO have returned to form after Snoke and a ton of higher ups died overnight and have finally sorted everything out. In Snoke’s contingency, the knights of Ren would all compete for the title of “assistant to the Supreme Leader” ala “rule of two”, and then Kylo would inherit Palpatine’s spirit and once again rule the galaxy. But Kylo refuses and Hux takes the opportunity to hunt him down as a traitor and take the role of “Supreme Leader”. Everyone knows how mad he’d get if he was called a traitor! So Kylo flees with only his direct fleet who are still loyal to him.
Think about it: there are six other Knights of Ren. Assuming they are each commanders, they have their own massive fleets to command. So if they all banded together into a Sith fleet, it would be six times the size of Kylo’s. Not to mention Hux would probably take his fleets and bail on him, too.
Kylo Ren is probably being persecuted by the Knights of Ren. He has now become the resistance to the Sith army. It’s possible even that in the beginning, the Knights of Ren are at a club meeting and they go over Snoke’s will and break out into a huge fight!
We were hinted by a Vanity Fair guy that said that we will explore more of the origin of the First Order, and I can only imagine that Snoke was Palpatine’s secret apprentice and he gave him the task of building a new Sith fleet but sent him into the outer rim to be forgotten. It could also be so that once the Empire implodes on itself with operation Cinder, the Sith Fleet would overwhelm a new Republic weary of war. This could also tie into the Knights of Ren being new Sith disciples or something, but who knows.
Meanwhile, Leia sends our crew to enlist an old Rebel hero named Lando to help bulk the resistance. But to do that, they first need to find his daughter, Jahnna, because she’d know where he is. They do and they find him on Pasana during the kite parade and he refuses until they offer him the Falcon back. He finally agrees.
Meanwhile, Rey and Kylo are still connecting via force chat and Kylo senses her location. He tries to convince Rey that they need to speak and Rey keeps refusing. He says something that indicates that he tracked them. Rey tells Finn, Poe, and C-3PO to escape and they take a sand barge to lead the FO away, but Rey goes alone to a completely empty spot intending to confront Kylo alone. After disabling his ship by flipping over it and pulling him out from the top hatch, they talk.
Kylo tells Rey that the FO has split. Snoke had his own contingency plan involving reviving the Sith. The knights of Ren have banded against him and united their fleets into the Sith fleet with their Sith troopers. He begs Rey to listen to him and tells her he knows what they need to do but he’s not strong enough by himself and he needs Rey to help him. She refuses and tells him do it himself, showing a hint of anger.
Rey goes into a meditation or something happens where she’s at her lowest low. Then ghost Luke appears and tells her to go to the forest moon of Endor to complete her final test, because, if you remember, he still owes her a third trial (since the third trial in TLJ was cut). She goes there and there’s an evil presence. She trains with the ball thingy and chops some trees. Then, the rest of the gang meets up with her, because they get intel that the FO is on their way there but don’t know why they would, but Rey does and Leia has a guess.
The crew journey to the remains of the Death Star II and Rey goes alone. She might carry with her some ancient Jedi doodad that she needs to bring with her, like a holocron or a kyber crystal. Whatever it is, one of those ancient Jedi texts were about how to exorcise Sith-possessed places and/or things.
Rey goes to the wreckage alone; after all, it’s the one thing she’s done for the majority of her life! On her way, Kylo shows up and tells her she doesn’t understand how dangerous it is and the dark side has a strong presence and Rey is super angry and they fight. The fight is like Mustafar, where they journey about the Death Star ruins while battling. Eventually, they get split up, probably by a tide forcing Kylo through a garbage chute.
Rey, alone, begins to hear a voice guide her. It’s Palpatine, possibly even as a ghost (but hopefully just a voice.) He essentially lures her into his private quarters where there are Sith collectibles all about. Rey looks around and then sees evil Rey, which is Rey in one of the Emperor’s cloaks and wielding one of the Sith items: a double butterfly-knife-lightsaber. They fight.
Basically, Evil Rey is Palpatine’s manifestation and if he wins, he will possess Rey for good. Rey is about to lose, but Kylo comes in at the end and saves her. Maybe he dies in the process (or definitely loses an arm), but he holds evil Rey off long enough to permanently do the thing that exorcises Palpatine for good. Or maybe, they defeat evil Rey and the two of them use both light and dark side powers to eradicate Palpatine and the Sith once and for all.
They emerge victorious, but when they return, Leia announces that the Sith army is here, presumably to greet their new supreme leader, reincarnated. Kylo Ren, though injured, calls in his FO forces. Of course, it’s not much, since very few stayed loyal to Kylo Ren. Kylo surrenders control to Leia and hops in his ship to fight alongside the Resistance. I don’t really know what Rey will do, but I guess maybe she’ll fly in an X-Wing, hopefully with R2-D2. Better yet, maybe they fly in a ship together and Ben and R2 are happily reunited.
See, the problem now is "who's the bad guy and what are they fighting for?" It's now a no-stakes battle.
Ok, so maybe, The knights of Ren make it to the ground and there's a land battle, too, and then Finn and Jannah use jungle horses to fight them. and then maybe, one of the Knights of Ren get possessed anyways.
Regardless of what happens to get there, at the second celebration on Endor, Rey and Ben are talking and are a little shy with each other. Then Leia shows up and sees that they’re holding hands. Leia then goes straight-eyed and says, “What are you doing?” And Rey and Kylo look at each other bashfully. And Leia says, “You’re brother and sister! Don’t do it!” And they both do a second-take, and Leia says, “You didn’t know? I thought it was obvious!” and that’s Carrie Fischer jabbing at us, the audience, one last time. Also, maybe ghost Luke stans with Leia and they laugh. End Credits.